How to Explain What You Do Without Feeling Like an Idiot

January 10, 2023
business people networking at an event

A quiet shuffle of weird hybrid ‘dress sneakers’ fills the room.

You stand quietly chatting with the one person you know at yet another networking event. It somehow feels like everyone was forced to be here, but only you are uncomfortable with it.

“I finally did it, bro.”

“What?”

“I got an ape, man! I’ve wanted one my whole life. #6,327!”

“Oh. Like the NFTs? Is that a good one?”

“Hell if I kn- HEY!”

Your friend motions to another guy wandering by, lifting his drink in one hand and a tiny plate of apps in the other. The universal sign for ‘Hey man, it’s good to see you! I’d shake your hand but look, my hands are full!’

“I was just telling Brian about my ape- oh this is Brian.”

You balance your tiny plate on top of your cup with the grace of a southern gentleman at a derby party and shake his hand.

“Hey, man. Brian.”

“How’s it going? You guys working together?”

“No, old friends.”

“Nice, bro. What do you do?”

“Oh. Nothing really. I, uh, I just do a bunch of reports and stuff in excel.”

“Damn, man. I’m shit at excel.”

“Me too. I mean, I’m not, but… yeah.”

You both stand awkwardly in the silence, suddenly teleported right back to that one time you called your 5th-grade teacher mom in front of the whole class.

“Weeeeelllll. See you around, Brad.”

You mumble “Brian” quietly, but he’s already gone.

So many people who are incredible at their job are absolutely TRASH at talking about what they do in a way that makes people care. It’s an epidemic, and I no longer use that word lightly. We’ve all spent so much time crating our perfect LinkedIn bios that nothing wants to come out when someone asks us face-to-face. Unfortunately, you can’t ask ChatGPT to write your real-life conversations.

The problem is that most people are too close to their work and get stuck trying to explain precisely what they do every day. Instead of what, focus on why. What problem are you solving? For who? For what benefit? Why are they better off afterward?

That might seem like homework, but talking about yourself without feeling like an idiot is actually pretty simple. There’s a four-step framework that, with about 2 minutes of brain function, can make this all so much less cringey:

I help [1. person/company/creature] [2. the problem you solve for them], by [3. How you solve that problem], so they can [4. success after the problem is solved].

Let’s break that down.

  1. Person/company/creature - This is ************your target audience, your customer, the hero in the story, or who you help to solve a problem. Be specific. Don’t just say people. Say ‘early-stage startup founders,’ ‘retired professional football players,’ or ‘non-profits in the sustainability space.’ You want a phrase that might make your conversation mate say, “Hey, I know one of those people!”.
  2. The problem you solve for them - Not what you do, but what problem would lead someone to give you a call. You want something that might make your conversation mate say, “Hey, I know someone with that problem!”
  3. How you solve that problem - Ideally, this is different than the expected solution and is a great place to slip in your unique selling proposition (USP). Even if you don’t think you have a USP, you do. Every single person has something they can use to help explain why the work they do is special, unique, or different. If you run on EOS, this is a great time to whip out those three uniques.
  4. Success - Paint a picture of what success looks like after the problem is solved. This doesn’t have to be a long-winded description of a happy life, but there should be some resolution to the story you are telling. You’re creating some stakes in the story, and even slipping in a little ‘failure’ language (what happens when they don’t work with me) can amplify the picture of success even more.

Ready for an example?

I help early-stage startup founders get venture capital by leading group pitch sessions, so they can meet a bunch of investors at once instead of pitching every firm one at a time.

  1. Who - Early-stage startup founders
  2. Problem - need venture capital
  3. How - leading group pitch sessions
  4. Success - meet a bunch of people
  5. Failure - pitching one at a time

See? Easy.

Feel free to push things around. As long as the pieces are there, the order should feel natural and conversational:

I lead group pitch sessions so early-stage startup founders can pitch multiple VCs at once.

Take a few minutes and, using this format, write in the comments what you do. I’ll click the little like button, I promise.

Don’t be like Brian.

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